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But, as we talked further, more serious concerns started to emerge. Of course, there’s humor in these comments.
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It’s a literal evening, a full-out commitment!” A Black woman saying, ‘I can’t, I gotta wash my hair,” isn’t a blow-off. “ don’t get why we gotta wrap our hair every night, or why you put oil in your hair when they wash oil out.
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Like, why are you not locking your doors?!” Another topic that came up often was hair. You have to teach them these things.” Another, married to her husband for 10 years, was exasperated with “the lack of security consciousness. One woman I spoke to, who’s been married to a White man for nine years, confided: “ don't understand why lotion is a must for us, because we’re preventing ashy skin. And in the 1994 film “Corrina, Corrina,” the Black housekeeper played by Whoopi Goldberg completely confounds her White employer and his daughter with her “spicy” recipes. The Black character is shocked that her White friend never uses a washcloth and the White character is shocked that her friend always does. For example, there was the “washcloth debate” between Tichina Arnold and Beth Behrs in a fall 2018 episode of the CBS sitcom The Neighborhood. When I discussed this with Black women, I found that some of those “teachable moments” were not only familiar to me personally (I’ve been in interracial relationships), but they also show up in pop culture. “There will be a number of teachable moments, so a willingness to learn and teach is key," she adds. Race and cultural differences can compound the difficulties of communication. “When two individuals from different ethnicities decide to enter into a relationship, they must do so with a level of open-mindedness, patience and understanding. Jamison, a relationship columnist and certified life coach. "Interracial dating comes with its own set of challenges, one of them being social bias,” agrees Shantell E. But given the growing number of interracial dating sites (such as and ) and the fact that interracial marriage within our community has tripled since the 1980s, it’s a conversation whose time has come. And interracial dating? Well, that can present a steep learning curve that few of us are willing to talk about - especially if you’re a Black woman dating a White man. Dating - particularly at midlife - isn’t easy.